The Virginity Check

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A young man was planning to get married and asked his doctor how he could tell if his bride is a virgin.

The doctor said, 'Well, you need three things. A can of red paint, a can of blue paint and a shovel..'

The man was astonished and asked, 'So what do I do with these?'

The doc replied, 'Before the wedding night, you paint your one ball red and the other ball blue. If she says, 'That's the strangest pair of balls I ever saw', you hit her head with the shovel


The Car Accident

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A woman and a man are involved in a car accident. It's a bad one. Both of their cars are demolished but amazingly neither of them is hurt. After they crawl out of their cars, the woman says, "So, you're a man... That's interesting. I'm a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt. This must be a sign from God that we should meet and be friends and live together in peace for the rest of our days."

The man replied,"I agree with you completely. This must be a sign from God!"

The woman continued, "And look at this, here's another miracle... My car is completely demolished, but this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our good fortune." Then she hands the bottle to the man.

The man nods his head in agreement, opens it, drinks half the bottle and then hands it back to the woman. The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

She replies, "Nah. I think I'll just wait for the police..."


The Breast Advantage

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A not necessarily well-prepared student sat in his life science classroom, staring at a question on the final exam paper.

The question directed:

"Give four advantages of breast milk."

What to write? He sighed, and began to scribble whatever came into his head, hoping for the best:

1. No need to boil.
2. Never goes sour.
3. Available whenever necessary.

So far so good - maybe. But the exam demanded a fourth answer. Again, what to write? Once more, he sighed. He frowned. He scowled, then sighed again.

Suddenly, he brightened. He grabbed his pen, and triumphantly, he scribbled his definitive answer:

4. Available in attractive containers of varying sizes.

He received an A.